by Steve Cook
The latest boon to the entertainment industry has been the roll out of Armageddon Inc's latest comedy masterpiece, " Fact Checking".
It is directed by legendary move-maker, Bulgarian director Salazaar Bim ("The Man who Lost his Sandwich", "The Mediatrix").
With a script masterfully written by Dennis Rothschild, the movie hilariously chronicles the futile attempts of the villain, known as "Book Face" and played by a deadpan Mark Suckerberg, to establish Global Mind Control.
To achieve this he sets out to stop everybody thinking anything without permission or getting, as he puts it, "any funny ideas" such as:
not liking being injected with aluminium
objecting to being microwaved
not wanting to be implanted with microchips that inform the CIA when one is on the toilet or buying Spam on eBay etc., despite the fact that such information is vital for Democracy. He pursues this master plan for world domination through a device known as the "Fact Checker" which detects when someone is having an idea and puts a stop to it by bombarding them with contrary ideas hand-picked from the central data base of approved facts held by the Global Fact Emporium.
Suckerberg, regarded by many as a latter day Buster Keaton, appears born for the role since an accidental botox overdose left him incapable of facial expressions except guilt or his trademark "nobody at home" look. His character, "Book Face", is so called because his face resembles a closed book, encapsulating hundreds of blank pages littered with the occasional small print.
In a classic and thought-provoking line from the movie, Book Face tells us that,
"There are facts, facts and ....er, other facts. Some facts are more factual than others and as a matter of fact it is well known you can use facts to prove anything, especially the truth, but the truth depends on which facts you use to prove it."
Thus, Book Face sets about creating an alternative reality by filtering undesirable facts from people's minds and paving the way for the Zombie Apocalypse in which governments tell people to stay in indoors and refrain from touching the walls.
As the story unfolds, an interesting back story is revealed, showing how Book Face began life as a happy-go-lucky computer nerd but accidentally got his brain rewired whilst on a trip to the Tavistock Institute at the hands of the renowned hypnotist, Soros, The Great Illuminato. His brain was then transferred into a robot that looks just like him but is made of Teflon.
What ensued from that fateful moment was a life of villainy and dreams of global dictatorship known as the Fact Reich.
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Genghis Kant: A novel by Steve Cook. Features incredibly alien household appliances and edible musicians. Available in paperback and ebook or injected straight into your brain. Find out more now._______________________________